29 October 2012

Chapter 41 - Possibilities


 “So what did you think of Anastasia, John?”

“I thought she was enchanting, Christian, although I think her appearance is probably quite deceptive. Behind that shy, quiet exterior, I think there is a very astute and perceptive young woman.”

“What makes you say that?”

“Well, for a start she didn’t hesitate to tell me that she thought I was an expensive charlatan,” John informs me sardonically.

I snort with laughter.

“She certainly got your measure straight off.”

But I still wish I knew exactly what had been said between them when they were dancing together at the masked ball. I fucking hate not knowing, especially as the most likely topic of conversation was undoubtedly me.

“Anastasia didn’t give much away, but I get the sense that there are hidden depths to her, and I suppose to some extent that’s why you find her so intriguing. She’s certainly a very lovely young woman, and I can understand why she’s captivated your heart, Christian, why you’ve fallen so hard for her.”

“About that. You were right. All this love shit. I figured it out… I can see now that I do… love Anastasia, even though I never thought it possible.” It’s still so fucking hard for me to say these things out loud.

“Because of your morbid self-loathing.” John sighs in apparent frustration with me. “Christian, how many times have we gone over this? You are very much capable of both giving and receiving love. It was very apparent to everyone at the ball that you and Anastasia are head over heels in love with each other. It was a joy to see. Love is a wonderful emotion.”

“I guess. But it also scares the shit out of me. I feel so vulnerable, because I'm so scared of losing her. I can't ever go through how I felt when she left me again.”

“And have you told Anastasia how you feel? Have you actually told her that you love her?”

“Sort of. She worked it out before I did, so that made it kind of easier.”

“As I thought – your Anastasia is indeed very perceptive. I really think she is going to be so good for you, because she seems able to see the real man, the one that’s normally hidden behind that closed off façade you always present to the world. Now that you’ve finally accepted that you are capable of love, my advice is that you really embrace these feelings. Don't be shy. Tell Anastasia frequently how you feel about her, that you love her. Love is nothing to be embarrassed or ashamed about, and openly declaring it will certainly help to bond this precious new relationship of yours. Being in love is something to be proud about, so why not freely declare it to the whole world?”

“I don’t know if I can do that. You know I've always been a very private person, John.”

“I appreciate that, but then you’ve never had these kinds of feelings before, have you? Also, I’m certain it would mean a great deal to Anastasia, to hear you freely and publicly acknowledging your feelings for her. It would really help with any self-confidence issues she could potentially be experiencing.”

“You picked up on that too?”

“Well, I think most young women have self-confidence issues to a degree,” he replies evasively, as he clears his throat and changes the subject, so I guess he doesn’t feel free to discuss this issue of Ana’s. 

But at least he’s dropped me a strong hint, so I resolve to try my best and work at telling Ana how I really feel about her. How hard can it be?

 “How are things working out between you? I take it you’re both working towards a compromise with regard to your sexual needs and desires. I know it’s early days, but how difficult are you finding it to control your more extreme inclinations?”

“Actually John, that side of things has been a lot easier than I anticipated, so far anyhow. We’re finding lots of other things to try out that I'm finding equally satisfying and fulfilling. Ben & Jerry’s & Ana. Mmm, delicious. And she’s willingly let me spank her a couple of times now, because she’s discovered that it really turns her on too.”

I can't help smiling at the recollection of Ana begging me to spank her. That was so fucking amazing.

“So you’re making progress and compromising to find the middle road by the sound of things. That’s excellent news, Christian, really excellent.”

“Yes, but…”

“But what?”

“What I am finding a lot harder than I expected is coping with the anxiety I experience, brought on by the lack of control I have over Ana, when she is the most important thing in my life now.  Because of all the extra security issues associated with being my girlfriend, I assumed that she would agree to let me take care of her. But not Ana - she’s still so stubborn and independent. I’m getting so fucking frustrated with her because as you know, Leila is still on the loose, possibly armed and potentially wanting to harm her. I can't take the risk that something could happen to her, and yet she fights against my orders all the time. And it’s not just the Leila issue either. After she insisted on going to work today, against my wishes I might add, things got even worse.”

“Do you want to fill me in about what exactly has you feeling so anxious?”

I take a deep breath and slowly exhale as I wonder where to start, how to explain the latest conflict between us. I realize I'm running my fingers through my hair, a sure sign that I'm feeling stressed.

“Everything started off so well this morning. You know Ana’s agreed to stay with me at my apartment because of the Leila situation? I’d always assumed I’d prefer living on my own, but you know what? I love having Anastasia staying with me. When she’s there, it just feels right, like a missing piece of the puzzle has fallen into place. I sleep so much better when we share a bed, and I don’t get any nightmares either. And then waking up in the morning next to her is just the best thing.”

I think back to this morning, how tempting Ana looked when I woke her up, as she lay there in bed all tousled and sexy. I’d resisted the temptation to wake her earlier so she could join me in the shower, knowing how bad tempered she can be when she doesn’t get enough sleep. I even debated whether to allow her to sleep in and miss work altogether, but I knew she’d be really pissed if I did that.

“I wish you’d come back to bed,” she whispered seductively, with that husky voice she gets when she’s turned on.

It took all my self-discipline not to jump back into bed again and fuck her mindless. Mind you, she hadn’t realized the time, and it was amusing to watch her panic and then leap out of bed to hurriedly get ready for work, when she saw how late it had gotten.

While Ana was in the shower, I took the opportunity to speak to Gail.

“Good morning, Mrs. Jones. I hope you had a pleasant weekend visit with your sister?”

“I did, thank you, Mr. Grey,” she smiled.

“And I take it that Taylor has apprised you of the latest situation, and that you feel reassured that the security of the apartment is no longer compromised.”

“He has indeed, sir. Although I have to say that I find it hard to believe that Miss Williams would ever actually harm anyone intentionally. She’s just a very confused and upset young woman in my opinion. That’s not how Mr. Taylor sees it, of course. He’s lectured me until he’s blue in the face about how I'm not to take any risks if I should encounter her again, when I think all she really needs is a big hug and someone to listen to her,” she huffed.

I imagine that Jason had read Gail the riot act, in just the same way that I had with Ana. He was horrified, as was I, that Gail had had to deal with Leila all by herself when she broke into the apartment armed with a razor blade, and made that haphazard attempt to self-harm.  

That was why I wouldn’t allow Gail to return to the apartment until we were sure it was safe, and in any case, I know Taylor would never take any risk whatsoever when it comes to her safety.

“I understand that Taylor has informed you that Miss Steele will be staying here with me, at least until there is a satisfactory resolution to the situation with Miss Williams,” I confirmed with her.

“Yes, he did.” Gail positively beamed at me as she replied. Why does she seem so happy about this, when it makes more work for her?

“She will be sharing my bedroom – her clothes and other personal belongings have already been moved over. I appreciate that having an additional person here will mean extra work for you, so you are to let me know if you require any extra assistance or help in any way.”

“Mr. Grey, it will be no problem whatsoever having Miss Steele staying here at the apartment, and it will be my absolute pleasure to look after her as well. To be honest, I sometimes feel rather underutilized, as you are so easy to look after,” she smiled sincerely at me. She had that soppy look in her eye – the one Mom gets when she talks to me about Ana. What was that all about?

“Good. Miss Steele will have pancakes and bacon for breakfast. And could you prepare her a packed lunch to take to work, as she will not be leaving the office at lunch time?”

“Of course, Mr. Grey. Once I’ve found out her preferences, I’ll ensure she has a tasty and nutritious meal to take with her.”

 Then I saw Ana making her way into the kitchen, wearing some of the new clothes Ms. Acton had supplied. As I always envisaged, she looked stunning in a gray fitted pencil skirt, a matching well cut silk blouse and black heels.  She’d put her hair up too, and I loved that look, seeing her neck exposed that way. Christ, if she came and worked in my office, I’d never get anything done. 

The thought of Ana working with that Hyde fucker, and him getting to ogle her all day still didn’t sit well with me, but I knew we had him under surveillance, and that Sawyer would be nearby, even if he wouldn't be in the actual office with her as I would have preferred.

As I told Ana how lovely she looked, out of the corner of my eye I caught Mrs. Jones beaming again for some reason, before she asked her what she would like for her lunch.

“Please, Mrs. Jones, call me Ana,” she insisted as she gave me a pointed look, as if daring me to say something about her being over familiar with the staff again.

So okay, I wasn’t jealous of Gail, but I’ll still have to remind her that staff are not friends, and that I would prefer that they stick to the usual protocol and address her as Miss Steele. But I didn’t call her out on it there and then, deciding that it could wait until a more opportune moment, as I had to leave for my eight thirty meeting. 

Even with the distraction of Ana, I don’t do late. Well, not usually anyhow.

She made me smile as I left, when she called out ‘Have a good day at the office, dear’, like we were an old married couple or something. It felt good, comforting somehow, and I liked it. In fact I fucking loved it.

As Taylor drove me to Grey House, I took the opportunity to remind him.

“Make sure Sawyer understands that Miss Steele is not to leave the building unaccompanied at any time. She has no need to leave the building at lunchtime, but even so, he must remain alert and not be complacent.”

I just couldn’t shake the feeling that Ana was still not taking the risk to her safety seriously, and might do something silly.

“I can assure you that Sawyer fully understands his responsibilities, and takes them very seriously indeed, Mr. Grey. He is one of the most reliable men I’ve ever worked with, both in and out of the forces.”

Taylor glanced at me in the rear view mirror, before fixing his eyes on the road ahead again. Okay, Jason, so I’m being overprotective about Ana, but can you blame me? I just can't bear the thought of any harm coming to her.

But right now, I realize my thoughts have run away with me, and I still need to fill Flynn in about what happened next, as he’s sitting looking at me expectantly, while he patiently waits.

I take a deep breath and then start opening up.

“We email each other a lot, especially when we’re at work – and I often find she’s more honest with her thoughts with this method of communication.”

“That’s an interesting observation. Any idea why that might be?”

“Maybe because she’s more comfortable with the written word?” I suggest.

“Could it possibly be because she finds you less intimidating that way?” John quietly suggests, as he plays with his pen, and watches to gauge my reaction. I take a minute or two to think about this.

“I guess you could be right. I am working on it,” I admit.

“So what were the emails about today?” he asks.

“First off, I thanked her for the wonderful weekend we just had, and that I hoped she would never leave, ever.  I just meant it as a general kind of remark, but when she asked me to clarify if that meant I wanted her to move in with me, I jumped at it. I told her yes, it did.”

“I see. That’s really quite a big step for you both this early on in your relationship. So how did she react?”

“She said we should talk about it this evening.”

“Wise girl. It’s certainly something to aim for, but only if you both feel it’s the right timing, the right thing for both of you.”

“But her living with me at Escala makes perfect sense, especially at the moment, and especially with what came next, which just proves I need to be around her to protect her, as she hasn’t got a clue about the big bad world out there.”

“What do you mean, Christian?”

“She casually announced to me in her next email that she ‘just thought I should know’ she was going to a conference, which would entail an overnight stay in New York with her sleazeball boss, Jack fucking Hyde. The one who, according to the background checks I ordered, always has young, attractive female assistants, but who never last longer than a couple of months. I haven’t got any actual solid evidence yet, but I'm sure he’s hit on all of them. He’s clearly a serial philanderer at least, if not something much worse. He’s certainly not the kind of man I’m going to let my girlfriend go off on an overnight trip with.”

“So how did you react to the news of this proposed trip?”

“I told her she wasn’t going, of course. I mean, over my dead body am I going to let him get his filthy paws anywhere near her. I said I’ll take her to New York if she wants to go, as I have my own apartment there.”

“And I take it she didn’t react well to this pronouncement from you, dictating to her about work related matters?”

“You could say that. She told me not to get my knickers in a twist. I told her it’s not my fucking knickers I'm worried about. Then she sends me an email ranting about trust, and irresponsibly refers to some of my more extreme sexual predilections in a fucking work email, for Christ's sake. I had to get Barney to delete it from the server, and phone her to tell her not to be so fucking stupid again. Then she phones me back to tell me she’s going to New York whether I like it or not, before she hangs up on me. Un-fucking-believable. She actually hung up on me. No one hangs up on me.”

John appears to be stifling a smile.

“There’s no doubt you definitely missed out on a whole stage of adolescent behaviors and experiences, Christian, but it appears that you and Anastasia are now making up for lost time in that department. So how did you manage to resolve the situation?”

“I took control, of course. I pulled a few strings to get an immediate moratorium on all spending in SIP implemented, the upshot being that Hyde gets to go to New York, but without Ana.”

“You mean you interfered with her job to prevent her going to New York on a work related matter? Don’t you maybe feel that was somewhat of an overreaction on your part, Christian? And may I ask just how you managed to get this moratorium imposed?”

“I'm not at liberty to disclose exactly how, but suffice to say I am taking whatever steps I deem necessary to protect what is mine. And in my view that is not overreacting, it is merely a sensible precaution.”

I know I am being deliberately obtuse in not actually telling Flynn that I’m buying SIP, but technically I am not at liberty to do so, as the news is still embargoed. I know he would never use this confidential information, but still. He stares at me for a moment, then his eyes widen as he works it out.

“You're buying the company? You’re taking over the company that Anastasia is working for, in order to control her? Surely you can see how this looks?”

“I look on it as protecting her. I’ll only interfere when absolutely necessary, such as when there is a potential risk to her safety. For fuck’s sake, what am I supposed to do, stand back and allow her to get raped by this guy? I trust Ana implicitly, but she’s just a small defenseless girl, she wouldn’t stand a chance against someone like him, even if he didn’t resort to something like Rohypnol. Don't forget, I saw how helpless she was when that photographer guy hit on her when she was drunk, and if I hadn’t turned up when I did…” 

I close my eyes and shudder in horror at the thought of how that could have ended up.

“You have no evidence that’s what would happen in this case.”

“I trust my gut instinct; it rarely lets me down. Hyde is bad news, and I'm not letting Ana’s ignorance and naivety mean she puts herself at risk with him.”

“I’m sure Ana wouldn’t let herself get into that situation, or put herself in danger.”

“No? Well, guess what she did next. Despite the threat of Leila being on the loose with a gun, despite assuring me that she wouldn’t leave the building by herself, to get me to agree that Sawyer didn’t need to escort her around the building, she still fucking well goes out alone at lunchtime, putting herself at high risk, just because that lazy bastard Hyde asked her to go out to get his lunch. Thankfully, I’d had the foresight to order Sawyer to monitor the only access point for the building, so he saw her leave and followed her to ensure her safety.” 
“What upset you the most – the fact that Anastasia disobeyed your instructions, or that in your opinion she put herself at risk?”

“Both, because it’s the same thing. I have to be sure she’s safe, and that’s why I gave her those instructions. But when I rang her after lunch to confront her about her irresponsible actions, how she reacted really confounded and shocked me.”

“What did she say?”

“She said I have to stop acting this way because I'm suffocating her. Suffocating her. She sounded really angry and upset about it too, which worried me and for a moment there I honestly thought she might call things off between us. But she didn’t, she said we’ll talk about it tonight after work. That’s why I pulled our appointment forward, John, so I could talk all this through with you, get your perspective on things.  
Look, I'm just trying to protect her, not suffocate her, even I know it’s not good if she feels like that. But what else can I do, given the current situation? I'd have thought she'd welcome someone who is prepared to take care of her and protect her, but instead I’m really worried by Ana’s reaction, and now I've got to wait until later this evening to see how she feels. Her bastard boss is making her work late, using the excuse that it’s necessary because she’s not going to New York with him now.”

“I'm surprised that you're surprised by her reaction, Christian. How did you think she’d feel? How would you feel in her shoes? All you seem to be considering is how you feel about something potentially bad happening, and not taking into account how restrictive this overreaction must feel to someone who, from what you’ve told me, has lived a pretty independent life until this point. 
You have to remember that she’s not one of your submissives, and she has not agreed to surrender all control and decision making over to you. Much as you might wish, you simply cannot protect her from every possible risk, although with your background, I do understand where your need to act in this way stems from. 
However, you need to be careful that your actions don’t have the exact opposite effect to the one you are trying to achieve. Anastasia may well be tempted to keep things from you in future, in order to prevent you from interfering. 
She’s a single, independent, strong minded young woman, who does not have to seek your approval for her actions unless she chooses to do so.”

“Well that’s another thing. As you say, the way things stand between us now, I have no rights whatsoever as far as she’s concerned. For example, if she got ill, legally I would have no say in her treatment. And despite the fact that she has virtually no money of her own, I can't force Ana to accept any of my money or possessions if she won’t accept a gift from me – that’s why she made that stupid bid for my place in Aspen at the masked ball, because I’d found a way to put some money in her account and she refused to accept it. But I'm thinking, if I was her husband, it would be different.”

“I see. So you are already thinking along the lines of asking Anastasia to marry you?” John seems surprised, as he frowns and scribbles something in his notes.

“Yes. We were booked in as husband and wife at the hotel this weekend, and it got me thinking. I really liked referring to Ana as my wife; I like the message it sends out to every other fucker that she is taken, that she is mine.”

“I can see how that would appeal to a man like you, Christian. Have you mentioned any of these thoughts to Ana yet?”

“No, not yet. I know it probably seems too soon, but now I know how I feel and what I want, I don’t see the point in hanging around and wasting time. I’ve always been decisive; it’s a strength, a necessary attribute to be successful in business. Know what you want and go after it, do whatever it takes to achieve your goal.  
I never want Ana to leave, or to be with anyone else, and I certainly don’t ever want to be with anyone else. So surely the next logical step is to make her my wife, and thereby ensure I have the right to be fully involved in all aspects of her life, to be able to keep her safe and protect her.”

John leans back in his chair and studies me intently for a minute or two, as he taps his finger on his lip.

“You don’t have much experience with women, do you Christian? Other than sexually, of course,” he quickly elaborates, when I raise my eyebrows at him. “You do realize that a contract of marriage between a man and a woman is nothing like a business contract, don’t you? Being Ana’s husband would still not give you the right to dictate to her what she can or cannot do. In reality, it wouldn’t allow you to control her.”

“No, but surely it would at least give me more control than I have now. As my girlfriend, she is a vulnerable target for all sorts of weirdoes, and yet I can't force her to accept protection from me. And I really want her to benefit from my wealth. I want to share everything I have to make her life easier, but as things stand right now, her stupid pride won’t let me. And I would really love to show the world that I'm totally committed to her, because of how much I truly love her.”

“Ah, finally, I’m hearing the right reason for wanting to get married. Because you love Anastasia. That’s far more like it,” John smiles. “I think asking Ana to marry you is a wonderful goal to work towards. But you must learn to walk before you can run. Your first priority is learning to communicate with each other far more effectively, to prevent these damaging confrontations between you. That’s the logical first step towards reaching your ultimate goal of marriage. She’s an intelligent woman, so explain to her more effectively why you have concerns about her safety, involve her in making the decisions, rather than just barking orders, which will inevitably make her feel angry and resentful and cause her to rebel against you.”

“But I'm only taking care of her and trying to shield her from all the shit, so she isn’t upset and worried by it. That makes sense doesn’t it? Why would she resent that? I don’t understand why women act that way.”

“In the words of the great Oscar Wilde ‘Women are meant to be loved, not understood.’ Basically, my advice is not to insult her intelligence; you have to try to take her feelings and thoughts into account, rather than just ignoring them, or always assuming you know what’s best. Discuss things, talk them through with Ana, ask for her opinion. If marriage is indeed your ultimate goal, you will have to think of it as an equal partnership between the pair of you, not as an excuse for you to simply regard her as your possession.”

“Okay, I hear what you're saying, although I don’t necessarily agree with everything you've said. But you’re not saying that marriage between us would be a bad idea? You think I can do it? I never thought it would be an option for a man like me. But since I've met Ana, all sorts of possibilities seem to be opening up. As long as you don’t think Ana marrying me would be wrong, that I'm not right for her, seeing as I've not told her everything about me, because she’d run if she knew.” 

You mean if she knew the whole truth about why you enjoy beating the shit out of little brown haired girls like her, Grey. Never forget that you are still one sick bastard.

I look at John, knowing that he is never less than totally honest with me, he never sugar coats the bitter pill, or bullshits me. That’s what I like about him, despite him being a rather oddball, out of place Brit. Another fish out of water I guess. And of course, he knows all of my really bad shit, but never seems fazed by it.

“As I keep telling you, just take things one step at a time, Christian. I think that as long as you continually work hard to keep all communication channels open between you, then a loving marriage with Anastasia would be an ideal goal for you to aim for. I believe that learning to support each other’s strengths and weaknesses would be perfect therapy for both of you. Therapy for Ana as well? He thinks she needs help too?

I leave the session with John feeling slightly reassured that at least he wasn’t totally horrified by the idea of Ana and me getting married, or reject it out of hand.

~~~

“How many times do I have to tell you to leave Anastasia alone?” I snarl at Elena when I phone her. “And how the fuck did you get her email address anyhow.”

Elena surprises me by laughing.

“She came running straight to you again did she? You have her well trained in one area anyhow, even if it’s not the right one. As for how I got her email address, I simply rang the reception desk at SIP and asked for it, Christian. I didn’t imagine Anastasia’s email address was meant to be some kind of a classified secret, seeing as potential authors need to be able to get in contact with her.”

“How did you know where she worked?” I ask suspiciously.

“It came up several times at the masked ball. Your little Anastasia was quite the topic of conversation, as I expect you can imagine, given that most people there, including your family, had assumed you were gay. If only they knew the truth, hmm?” 

Elena bursts into her high pitched tinkling laugh which I find highly irritating, as I’m not finding any of this amusing in the slightest.

“Elena, I don’t appreciate you going behind my back yet again, when I have made my wishes abundantly clear to you several times now. I'm pleased that Ana has forwarded your email for me to handle, because surely you recall how I specifically told you to leave Anastasia alone, the last time we spoke? For fucks sake Elena, when are you going to get the message that she is not interested in being friends with you, and that I am not comfortable with this professed desire of yours to ‘fill in the gaps’ with her.”

“Have I touched on a raw nerve? Do you think I’m going to disclose  something that you still feel the need to hide from Anastasia? That doesn’t sound very honest of you, seeing as you’ve informed me that you're in a regular relationship with her, whatever that means. 
I just thought I’d try one more time to smooth things over, now that I understand how important she is to you. I know all this repression of your true needs and desires is not going to be at all easy for you, so I figured you’re both going to need all the help and support you can get. 
I worry about you, because it’s not as if even your family truly understand all your issues, is it?  There really is no one else who can offer the kind of help and support that I can, so I felt it my duty not to give up lightly, whatever you misguidedly believe about not wanting to be a burden to me. I’ll always be here for you Christian, no matter what happens.”

“I don’t need your help. Anastasia doesn’t need your help. So just stay the fuck out of our lives, Elena. No more meddling in affairs that don’t concern you. Last warning.”

“As you wish, Christian. But whatever you say now, just remember that I’ve always been your truest friend, and so I'm not just going to abandon you. I've always been here for you, haven’t I? Nothing is going to change that, whatever type of relationship you’re in now. So, if you need me, I’ll be here waiting for you. I'm not just a fair weather friend, not after all these years and all the experiences we’ve shared.”

“I have Anastasia now, so I don’t need your kind of support any more. I appreciate your concern, but it really is entirely unnecessary. Goodbye, Elena.”

“Goodbye, Christian. Take care. Rest assured, I’ll back off for now, but I’ll still be watching out for you.”

~~~

I’m nervous as Anastasia gets in the car when I pick her up after work, as I'm not sure how angry she still is. Flynn says we need to learn how to communicate more effectively, so I decide to just ask her outright.

“Are you still mad?”

“I don’t know,” she murmurs. At least she doesn't sound too angry, and when I take her hand to gently kiss it, she makes no move to snatch it back. Good, that’s a positive start.

“It’s been a shitty day.”

“Yes, it has.”

“It’s better now that you’re here,” I tell her truthfully. 

Being with her is enough to help me start to relax and unwind. I just like being able to touch her and feel her next to me.

The journey back to Escala doesn’t take long, and when Taylor drops us off, we quickly run in out of the rain, and wait for the elevator. I kick myself, because Ana notices me scanning the surrounding area.

“I take it you haven’t found Leila yet?” she asks.

“No, Welch is still looking for her,” I mutter. It is so fucking frustrating that she seems to be able to just disappear off the face of the earth, and then reappear at will.

The elevator arrives and we step in. And it’s there again, that sizzling, electrifying, chemistry between us in the confined space. 

I want her, right here, right now. I look at Ana, and she has that fuck-me-now look in her eyes.

“Do you feel it?” I whisper.

“Yes.”

“Oh, Ana,” I groan, as I grab her and tip her head back to kiss her, and her fingers find their way into my hair to tug me down to her. Somehow we end up against the elevator wall, both breathing heavily, both turned on beyond belief.

“I hate arguing with you.”

All the tension that has built up today somehow finds its release as we kiss, a deep passionate kiss with our tongues entwining, as our hands frenziedly explore each other’s bodies. As I run my hand up her leg, I make a discovery that sends me even wilder.

“Sweet Jesus, you’re wearing stockings,” I moan, as I caress the soft skin exposed at the top of her lacy stocking. I find stockings so fucking erotic. “I want to see this.”

There is no way I'm going to be able to wait until we reach the apartment. I’m far too turned on and desperate, so I pull her skirt right up to feast my eyes on Ana’s sexy legs in their sexy stockings. 

I groan and reach over to press the stop button, and the elevator coasts to a halt between the twenty-second and twenty-third floors. 

I always knew the day would come when we’d fuck in this elevator, and turns out today's the day.

We’re both panting as we gaze at each other, and she leans against the back wall.

“Take your hair down.”

I want her to show me how wickedly seductive she can look.
Ana lets her glorious hair tumble down around her shoulders, right down to her breasts. 

“Undo the top two buttons of your shirt.”

Anastasia slowly complies with my order, so now I can see the tops of her fantastic breasts.

“Do you have any idea how alluring you look right now,” I whisper, unbelievably turned on by her.

She shakes her head as she tantalizingly bites her lip, knowing exactly what effect that has on me. I close my eyes as I swallow hard, trying to keep myself under control. I step closer to put my hands either side of her face, caging her in without actually touching her. 

She looks up at me with those beautiful big blue eyes of hers, as I lean down and run my nose against hers.

“I think you do, Miss Steele. I think you like to drive me wild.”

“Do I drive you wild?” she murmurs, still gazing into my eyes.

“In all things, Anastasia. You are a siren, a goddess.”

I have to have her. I hitch her leg up around my waist, so now she’s directly against my rock hard erection, as my cock demands contact with her. 

She moans and throws her head back as I kiss and nip her throat and drink in her unmistakably delicious scent. It drives me over the edge. We need to fuck.

“I’m going to take you now, Anastasia.”

She arches her back to grind herself against me, just as desperate as I am.

I grab one of the condom packets I always keep in my pocket these days, as I quickly undo my fly. I can't fucking wait until we can be truly spontaneous, but for now, we impatiently undo the packet between us, so I can sheath up.

“God, I can't wait for the next six days,” I growl. “I do hope you’re not fond of these panties.” I just rip them off her, not even attempting to take them down.

Then I thrust right into her, savoring the soft, warm slickness that engulfs my desperate cock. Ah yesss. That feels so good. 

 We are always so fuckingly amazingly good together. I slowly withdraw and then slide in again. We both groan with sheer pleasure. We are totally connected by our mutual need of a raw, basic fuck. 



“You're mine, Anastasia.”

“Yes. Yours. When will you accept that?” she moans, as I push slowly into her again to fill her completely. 

She feels so tight and slick around my length. She feels perfect, perfect for me and only me. My Ana.

Then I start really moving, pulling her leg tighter around me, locking her to me, as I drive hard into her, really deep and hard, and she tilts her hips up to meet and match me, claiming me deeper still into the very core of her body. 

On and on, over and over, I push her to the edge, claiming her as mine each time I slide my cock deep inside her. She is mine.  I am hers. Nothing else exists or matters. 

“Oh, baby.” I feel her spasm and clench around me as she comes, such a fantastic feeling, so I lose myself in her, calling out as I release into her. “Ana, my Ana.”

~~~

“Taylor will be wondering where we are,” I grin, as I set the elevator going again. I imagine he was surprised to arrive in the apartment via the service elevator before us, even after parking the car, but I don’t doubt he’ll soon work out what we’re up to. 

He'll quickly surmise that the elevator is our latest little fuck pad. It won’t worry him; at least we’re safely out of harm’s way in here.

Anastasia hastily tries to smooth her hair and adjust her clothes as the elevator completes its delayed ascent.

“You’ll do,” I smirk. 

Why bother to try and conceal the evidence of what we were up to, when Taylor will know anyway? And if I want to fuck my girlfriend in the privacy of the empty elevator, I fucking well will. And I fucking well just did. And it was one mighty fine fuck that has eased our tensions perfectly.  I feel so much fucking better now.

“Problem with the elevator,” I casually tell Taylor, who is standing waiting in the foyer as we step out. Ana blushes profusely and hurries towards the bedroom without looking up at him, and I'm pretty sure I see the hint of what could pass as admiration roll over Taylor’s usually impassive face.  

Yeah, I actually fucked her in the elevator.  

But I immediately head towards his office, because I must get to the CCTV footage first, to erase the evidence of our lustful elevator liaison.

It’ll probably be best if I don’t mention it to Ana. She’d freak, I know she would. 

She’d never have been so uninhibited if she’d realized there was a hidden surveillance camera in the elevator.


I don’t own any of the Fifty Shades Trilogy or the characters therein. They belong to E L James. I’m just borrowing them for fun and not for profit. Please refer to the Legal’s page for further details. This work is not to be copied or reproduced in any way without permission. 

129 comments:

  1. Thank you! Im sure its another good one! I have been checking your blog every 5 hours since the last one LOL!

    Madel

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  2. The elevator was SOOO HOT! And I love Flynn, he's one of my favorites!

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  3. I've been waiting forever. well, all of us readers! Thank you so much for Uploading! really :)

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  4. Another amazing chapter! LOVED the whole Flynn convo! You capture Flynn and Christians convos and personalities so well!:-) and the elevator was HOT! Thank you so much for this chapter and all you do!<3 cannot wait for new and especially more Flynn convos!

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    1. This was very good, I am sure enjoying this. The writer is very good.

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  5. Another great chapter, thanks for curing my Monday Blues!!! I can't wait to read the next chapter!

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  6. Fantastic as always ,keep up the good work... next chapter please :-)

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  7. I realyy love the interaction with Flynn. He is such an underexplored character in the Trilogy and he, better anyone, have a handle on Christian's emotional and pyscological maturity. He knows all of Christian's bad sh!t, as Christian calls it. And Flynn is grounded especially when he listens to Christian share is concerns, which to the emotional mature Flynn to be so far-fetched and in some cases, just plain rediculous.understand from reading some of your posts this weekend that you've had some personal issues that required your attention more so than this story.

    I sincerely hope that things are better (or headed that way) and I know I speak for so many of your fans and followers when I say thank you for this installment despite whatever is happening in your world. God bless. Again, you have amazed me with your incredible insight and imagination.

    Bethann

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    1. Hi Bethann. Flynn is a huge force for good in Christian's life, imo.

      Things seem to be quieter this week on the family front, which is just as well as I am trying to get ahead of myself. I am going to be away visiting the States for the next two weeks - luckily not on the East coast!

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    2. The States?? I hope you enjoy your visit here. Do you have any family or relatives that you will be visiting??? I am always amazed why so many want to visit here. Honestly, I do not know what we have to offer that is so interesting. Remember, we are the ones that left England. If you don't mind, which part of the U.S. are planning to visit????

      Bethann

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    3. We're touring around California and Arizona. I love San Francisco, so I'm really looking forward to going there again.
      I love coming to the States - it is so many different places in one huge country. Vegas is so different from Yosemite, for example. I guess it's hard to appreciate when you live there yourself, and at times I feel the same way about England I suppose, much as I love here too :)But I think we Brits from the mother country definitely feel an affinity to you lot over there, and we just about speak the same language, don't we?

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    4. Only the NE is getting it really bad.. We in Georgia have awful winds....it's causing issues....but not too much! Enjoy the west coast though... I'm Trinidadian... So I have the benefit of being British and African (i'm black) by culture...

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    5. We visited Southern California last November and had a blast and was in September, but a very, very different culture from where I live. Being born and raised in Southern Louisiana, we have the best best food anywhere on the planet and very hot, hot and humid weather. But you are right in tnat I take for granted what the US has to offer or entice visitors from other countries.

      Language is not really a barrier, but I do find phrases in your work that are truly British/European and something that I would never hear here but very interesting. Sometimes I find myself googling some of the words so I'll understand what you are trying to say. I figure I am in the minority as most of your readers aren't from the US and understand your truly unique phrases and dialect. But I still enjoy your writing so so much. Keep it coming and I hope you have a good visit.

      Bethann

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    6. Bethann I too am American and sometimes struggle with some of the British terms. But once I google them, I substitute how we would say it here just for my own pleasure.

      The US is a beautiful place to visit. I am from the East Coast ( Philly by way of Connecticut to be exact), and the East Coast is probably one of the most beautiful places to visit this time of the year. Maybe not this week or next with the hurricane but with the fall foliage it's breathtaking.

      There are so many differences throughout the US that others don't seem to have. I have never visited England but like Ana it's definitely a place I plan to visit and real soon. I hope you have a great time visiting the US, the West Coast is fun and offers different things from the East Coast, you should visit sometimes. I am partial to Philly and then you can see how the deflection from the mother country really went down. ;)

      Can't wait for the next chapter. I will be patient, please enjoy your visit. And relax, you can probably use it. And rest assured that your loyal fans will be here when you get back.

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    7. Now you've got me curious - what British terms have you had to google to make sense of?

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  8. Thank you for yet another great installment....Can't wait for what's to follow.

    Kari

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  9. OMG! The elevator scene was soooo friggin' HOT! i can't wait to read the next chapter! yay! thank you so much! :)

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  10. Thanks for another amazing chapter that truly sheds more light on Christian and what goes on inside his head. The time and dedication you devote to this blog is mind-boggling and I cannot thank you enough! From one of your loyal followers (1.3 million+ of us), you certainly took some of the edge off of Hurricane Sandy! I think I am falling even more deeply in love with Christian...

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    1. Hope Hurricane Sandy blows itself out sooner rather than later.

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  11. i knew it was gonna end there... thank you.. Leila's scene is next and i'm sure you'll be needing more time on writing that one.. and I will be patiently waiting for it.. ;)

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  12. Terrific chapter. Nice way to ease my cold. (sneeze) Love Flynn! Christian and he talking is so entertaining. He'll open up more with the good doctor than anyone else (cough) like a sorely needed confidant. And that is a hot elevator scene! Every time I take the elevator now I'll think of those two getting it on! (sniffle) Loved the chapter, love your writing, love your blog. Looking forward to the next (wheeze) chapter.

    Nan :D

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    1. Sounds like you should be tucked up in bed with a nice hot toddy! Take care Nan.

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  13. Fantastic as always, love reading the interactions between Flynn and Christian, you just bring Christian alive Thankyou x MEL

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  14. That was thoughtful of you to post the new chapter for us. We are NewEnglander under state of emergency for hurnican Sandy. It was nice to sit back and enjoyed your wonderful writing. Always love Christain and Flynn conversations. It madd sense that Christain already thinking about the next big step with Ana.
    Got my tissues ready for the melt down.
    Kim

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  15. Thank you! I too was checking the site every few hours, as I was anxiously awaiting my fix! Thank you for putting me out of my misery and making my Monday morning.. heck... making my week!

    Laters baby,
    Angel

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  16. Thank you so much! That was well worth the wait!

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  17. YEY!!! I love getting notifications that a new chapter is up!! Once again my friend, your writing is amazing..love the whole "therapy in session" thing with John!! So good..So.Good!!!

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  18. Thank you so much we all know how hard this week was for you ,but hope its all better now, can't wait for Ana apartment confortation with Laila and the bathing by christion .

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  19. This was phenomenal. Love the way you write his pov very believable. Keepem coming.

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  20. I Leave in Va in we are getting hit by Sandy, but I so happy that I was able to read your new chapter, I really love it, THANK YOU SOOOOO MUCH

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  21. Sometimes I feel like Dr Flynn is a father figure to Christian. He helps Christian sort things out like no one else can, he is more than a psychiatrist...he us a much needed friend. This chapter post came as a very welcomed surprise since I'm homebound from tropical storm Sandy in New York. I hope all your east coast followers are safe and well. Xo Carol

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    1. I agree, Carol. I think Christian sees Flynn as non judgmental. Much as he loves his parents, I think he worries about shocking and disappointing Grace and Carrick if they knew the 'real' him.

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  22. Another terrific chapter!! Love your writing and can’t wait to read the next one… Great Job!!!

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  23. Always look forward to this story. Love your writing.

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  24. Amazing as usual! I love your blog! You're an amazing writer and I can't wait the next chapter !

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  25. Always look forward to this story. Love your writing.

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  26. I was having withdrawals haha! Another amazing chapter! Thank you!!!

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  27. thank you very much for another great chapter!!! I'm already craving for the next one

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  28. This was awesome! Thank you!

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  29. great writing, great chapter! thank you!!

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  30. way to make it through a hurricane!! love the storyline. i know it takes time, my only "criticism" would be, i read them too quickly! can't wait for more!

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  31. another great chapter thank you for making my monday great after i did my good deed and gave blood today . Hope all is well with you and your family . well done again thank you xxx

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  32. I was wondering when your next chapter was coming. I have missed you. This was another amazing chapter (as usual). Loved the session with Dr. Flynn. I am so looking forward to the next chapters as these were my favorite from book 2. Thanks so much for your blog. I truly love it.

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  33. loooved it, thanks

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  34. Haaaaaaa, I've often wondered if the elevator had hidden camera.. You just filled in the blanks.. Awesome chapter.. :)

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  35. Fantastic well worth waiting for i love how you put across Christians POV

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  36. Another well done episode Master Grey. It was very interesting that you erased the elevator footage right after you stepped off. You were right, Ana would have been beyond mortified if she knew about that video!

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  37. Well worth the wait! Thank you! One of my fave parts is coming up.... So I can't wait! Ooh you rock! Will you be writing while on vacation? That probably wouldn't be much of a vacation huh?

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  38. well worth the wait totally loved the chapter cant wait for the next one keep up the fantastic work.

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  39. Omg don't Belive that a camera how shameful poor ana ha brill just love it

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  40. I was so happy when I checked and there was athnother cthapter! LOVE Flynn's smirk when she hung up on him! The next chapter with the reveal and the proposal.....I'm quivering with anticipation!

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  41. That was GOOD! Ohh, thenext one is going to be killer...thanks again!

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  42. Oh my, that was a very sensual elevator ride. Your chapters always manage to get us all hot and steamy. I love the chapters you write with the good old Dr Flynn, its parts of the books we don't see so you get full reins and you write them perfectly. You always show Flynn as a very insightful person. I think you're very creative and have a brilliant imagination, its chapters like that I think is your best. As always, can't wait for next chapter and take care xx

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    1. Thanks Amy - behind the scenes chapters are the ones that I enjoy writing the most :)

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  43. OMG I LOVE IT can't wait for more!!!

    ~Annalee

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  44. I always love the interaction between Christian and Dr. Flynn. I never thought about the cctv in the elevator, that was a nice touch. I can't wait for the next chapter when Elena shows up. I always wondered if she could tell what just happened in the elevator ;)

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  45. Thank you for another wonderful chapter. Your writing of Christian's POV is amazing and in my opinion spot on. It was the highlight of my day as Hurricane Sandy is wreaking havoc all around me. I am glad to hear your family life is a little quieter. Enjoy your trip. I love California.

    Debi

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  46. Awesome chapter. Worth worth worth the wait. Can't wait for next one.

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  47. Wow! Awesome...... I so wish you would publish this as a book...

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  48. Hooray for delayed gratification! Just fantastic, as usuall. Thank you for writing such a great piece after such a shitty week. Can't wait for the next chapter.

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  49. Well done!! I really enjoyed the conversation with Dr.Flynn. As always worth the wait! So very creative and I can't imagine Christian any other way!! Thank you for making my day and I will await patiently for more....
    Lisa x
    p.s.
    love the elevator scene!!

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  50. thankyou once again for this hot hot chapter,i am now recovering well from my operatiion and your writing is the reason why,i can,t wait for the next one,soon please.

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    1. Glad to hear you're on the mend, Georgina. I'm working on the next chapter :)

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  51. Thank you for another amazing chapter. And our prayers are with those in Sandy's path.. from down under Perth Australia.

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  52. What can I say? i am speechless, another great chapter.
    I really enjoyed the conversation with Flynn.
    and again still wanting for more...

    from Aussie with love

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  53. Love Flynn! and the elevator scene! Thank you for doing this .Hugs from Honduras

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  54. Amazing! Love the dialogue back and forth between Christian & Flynn. And of course the elevator scene was hot. Love hearing Christian's point of view. Can't wait for the next one. Really looking forward to also how your gonna do his point of view in the charlie tango incident. Can't wait! Keep it up :)

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  55. Amazing! Love the dialogue back and forth between Christian & Flynn. And of course the elevator scene was hot. Love hearing Christian's point of view. Can't wait for the next one. Really looking forward to also how your gonna do his point of view in the charlie tango incident. Can't wait! Keep it up :)

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  56. Thanks again for another great chapter!

    Hope you enjoy your trip to Arizona. It's where i am and its great weather now :) hope we get another before your trip but if not have a great time :)

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    1. Glad to hear the sun is shining in Arizona as I'm trying to plan what to pack! I should update again before I go, all being well :)

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  57. Once again thank you for another great great great chapter...you made my day/night..very tasty;-)

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  58. Thank you for an amazing chapter. In my opinion, a great writer is someone that can make you feel something with just a few word which is something you do so well.

    I have a small request, though. If you decide to continue on into the third book (which I hope you do) could you please, please do a chapter on the wedding ceremony. That was something I was looking forward to and was a little disappointed that it wasn't in Fifty Shades Freed. And since Christian thought that was something that would never happen for him, seeing the ceremony from his POV would be amazing.

    Anyways, keep up the good work. You truly have an amazing gift :)
    Jamie

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    1. Hi Jamie - I was just thinking about the wedding recently, and I will be covering it when I finally reach that part of the trilogy.

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    2. Yay!!! I was so disappointed when E.L didn't write about it... I kinda hope you'll write the whole month of preperations for the wedding too but I guess that's too much to ask lol... I wish you could write about Ana telling Kate about the contract but that's a little hard doing from Christian's POV haha

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    3. Thank you so much!!! You have no idea how happy you've just made me :)
      Jamie

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    4. I am so glad to hear that you may cover that. I was really looking forward to that wedding when I finish FS Darker, but when it never came I was so disappointed. Well the up side is that I think you may do it better than EL James. Not because her writing is not good, but because yours is better. And I think it's more interesting from Christians POV.

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  59. This was excellent. Ahhh, the love story continues to unfold. Well written. By the way, I think Elena needs to spend some time with Dr. Flynn.

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    1. Ha! I think hell will freeze over before Elena consults Dr. Flynn! But I agree, she needs help.

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  60. Another awesome chapter. Loved the dialogue between Fifty and Flynn. Loved the elevator scene. Thank you for your dedication and commitment to your blog. You're awesome. Hope all is well in your personal life and you have a great trip to America.

    Mal from NZ

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  61. All I can say is AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH, lol. I've been waiting all week for that fix!!! I must say, the elevator scene is one of my favorites from the book. I love Christian's spontaneity!! There's nothing like throwing caution to the wind, and just acting on impulse!!! As always, you never disappoint!!!! While you're in the states, will you be working on the next chapter for next week, or will we have to wait until you return??

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    1. My plan is to write three short chapters that will be posted during my trip away, to keep everyone happy. Whether that plan will come to fruition is another matter!

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    2. Yar! I hope it covers Elena's visit... Leila, submissive Christian and the proposal....but I know that's a lot to cover in 3 short chapters....but I'm wishful and hopeful!

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    3. That definitely works for me!!! I can't wait!!! Keep em' coming!!!!!

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  62. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  63. when will you be going away .i am going away on sunday for 16 days hope you have a good time you wel need it xxx

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    1. I leave on Saturday 3rd, away for 16 days also. Where are you off to, Mandy?

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    2. I am off to spain and meeting up with family and friends and than myself and my husband are having our first holiday together in 20 years since having the children to new year and than back on the queen mary on the 30th December . Where are you off to xx

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  64. Another fantastic chapter,i really like Flynn,i love that he puts everything into perspective for Christian and makes him see that he can have a great relationship with Ana.

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  65. Well that was very much worth waiting for I want an elevator of my own loved the more detailed conversation with Flynn absolutely brilliant cant wait for the next chapter your proof reading sub heather xxxx

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  66. 1 word WOW
    Loved it from start to finish
    Another great chapter
    Lou xx

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  67. Another great chapter. Was looking forward to a visit to Dr Flynn and you didn't disappoint. I hoped this chapter would include the "I love you" statement, Elena's unexpected visit and late night piano sex! I can't wait for Leila next. I'm so curious about the purchase of the ring! Can't get enough of your story, sorry we all want more from you and keep begging for it. Keep up the great writing.

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    1. Hi LisaN - all in good time. I will be covering all the best bits, but I don't want to rush things. And it means you still have so much to look forward to after all:)

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  68. Great, great, great once again. I love the conversation between Christian and Flynn. He really is truly happy for Christian. I wish I could have read this through the tropical storm we just experienced on the east coast of the US, (no Internet or power) but it was great to see the new chapter once everything came back on. It's a shame that I checked for a new chapter before I reset clocks . But it was so worth it. Thanks, can't wait for the next chapter.

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    1. Hi Brooke. Hope things are calming down after Sandy. Glad you enjoyed the chapter.

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  69. Brilliant! I love Dr. Flynn!

    Have fun on your trip!

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  70. Aah thank you!x my email is megcrawford99@hotmail.co.uk and don't worry about people saying to update more! You do what you need to do! You have such an amazing talent it's worth waiting for!x

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    1. Have added your details - you should get a confirmation email that you will need to click on. Check your spam if you don't get anything.

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  71. Always so enjoyable a distraction to read one of your chapters in the midst of a busy day - Thank you! I truly appreciate your efforts. - n-boston

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  72. i love how you write fiftys!. im always laught out lound!

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  73. I think that the contrast that you portray between Christian's two most trusted confidants, Flynn and Elana, is very interesting, and adds depth to the story line. gives more insight as to why C is so confused. they seem to represent his conscience, the good voice and the evil voice. it is interesting to watch his transformation from arrogant, cocky, selfish jerk to someone who actually cares for someone other than himself. thanks for feeding my obsession. you are like crack to me! I really look forward to "more".

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    1. Thanks - I agree about Flynn and Elena. Sometimes Christian has a hard job figuring out which is the good voice and which is the bad one. But we know he gets there in the end.

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  74. So I gave my book club on IG your blog address so they can all read this!! You are amazing

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    1. I hope your book club all like my blog :) Thanks for letting me know.

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  75. I just found your blog yesterday and I've now read through all your chapters. I love how you capture Christian. I am totally addicted, as I was to the books. This is a nice insight into the 50 shades world after I was having withdrawal after reading the book 3 times.
    Keep up the good writing - I am looking forward to your next chapters.
    I am almost sorry that I found this blog before you have written all the chapters, because now I can hardly wait for your next chapters ;o)

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    1. Good to know you found your way to my blog, and you are very welcome.That's the catch isn't it? I know some people have said they aren't going to read my blog anymore until the story is complete, but whether or not they'll stick to that I don't know.

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  76. Was excited when I found your blog so I could peek what's going on in Christian's head. You've pictured him in an excellent way, so realistically as though I can see him in front of me deciding on whatever necessary to protect his Ana... loved the part where he deliberately plaid obtuse to fool the good Dr Flynn that he was actually in the middle of SIP-acquisition. And also loved how the good Dr Flynn figured out that fact.
    Excellent insight on how Christian is thinking of entering into a different contract with Ana, he thinks it will give him more control over her and bring him the control he needs to exercise.

    in fact, love your writing in general :)
    Passed you address to several friends of mine so they can enjoy the reading :)
    Great that it hit you to write Christian's POV and that you decide to share your excellent writing with us.
    hope we don't get us to wait for the next chapter for too long

    Maria

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  77. Loved this chapter, how it filled in the blanks on Christian's end & loved his interaction with Dr. Flynn (whom i picture as Colin Firth). Thank you for the Fifty fix!! Enjoy your trip to the states!! I love living in California & having so many diverse places just hours away. We spent last weekend at the beach and will be on a day trip to San Francisco in a few weeks. If u can, stop at Kara's cupcakes in Ghiradelli Square...to die for!!!

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    1. If we have time, we'll be sure to call in there :)

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  78. Thank you. Worth the wait. Looking forward to the next chapter. Don't keep us waiting too long. I need my Fifty fix.
    -Tammy

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  79. I really like the way that you incorporated a meeting with Dr. Flynn to develop Christian's point of view. LOVED that he had to run and erase the CCTV footage of he and Ana gettin' funky in the elevator. And I could so see Taylor--in my mind's eye--giving Christian the "You da man" head nod as Ana is running into the apartment!!! Freakin' priceless (pun intended)! Good in you!!

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    1. Ha! Yes, all men are proud of their sexual prowess aren't they :)

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  80. Thx for this blog. I read one of your comments about 3 short chapters. I could wait until you get back from vaca. Your mind would be more relaxed to write a good long chapter. Take care of you first. When u get back, the chapters will be very well written (as they always are) and worth the wait.

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    1. Don't worry - I've broken down what would normally be one long chapter into three installments, which will put me in the perfect place to resume when I get back from my trip. But thank you for being so thoughtful. This is what I love about all my followers on here :)

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  81. dont stop please, i cant get enough

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  82. I love this chapter! Thank you. And I noticed that you said you were coming to the states? I live 15 minutes from San Francisco! Such an amazing city, especially if you know where to go and all the hidden secrets.

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    1. Well we only have a couple of days in SF, but feel free to send me a personal message with any tips and hints if you have the time :)

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  83. Brilliant love all these chapters in christens perspective!!!! Keep them cumin can't wait for d next one!!! Hope it's soon....

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  84. Oh the suspense, look forward to the next chapters :)
    Bronny (New Zealand)

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  85. dont know what else to say but once again LOVE LOVE LOVE !! <3 <3<3

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  86. You are amazing. I can not wait for the next chapter. Funny how "Fifty Shades Of Grey" turned into the most beautiful love story of all time. You feel so apart of their lives. Please continue to create Christian's version of the story. Many Thanks (Susan in Canada)

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  87. Love it. Great convo with Flynn. I can totally imagine it happen just as you written it.

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  88. Will you be writing any further to this Blog??? I hope you choose to do such as you are a very talented writer that I adore as do loads of other followers........please keep us up dated as soon as possible......I hope all is well in your personal like.............thanks in advance, Diana

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  89. I love your writing so good. :) you make it seem so real. Sometimes I forget its a blog and that its the real thing. I cant wait to get to the third book.

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  90. I love the chapters where you expand on Christian's meetings with Dr. Flynn. They help understand what is really in Christian's mind and show how Dr. Flynn has helped Christian in such an amazing way. Right now 'they' are having so much trouble getting the movie going -- it's too bad they don't, won't, or can't add your story to the mix. I think it would give them a more complete picture of Christian's world........I'm late to finding your story.....but I'm sure glad I did.

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  91. Nice take on things by making it into a conversation with Christian and Flynn. Something different.

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